Developing a Sexual Identity Orientation

This week's reading about sexual identity was cringe worthy at times, but overall a worthwhile read. It was interesting to read about the perspectives of young adolescents who are just starting to develop and explore their sexual identity. As an educator of adolescents, I rarely think about the fact that my students are exploring this interwoven part of their identity. I was intrigued to hear about the basic framework of sexual education courses that are supposed to educate our youth. These descriptions brought me back to my 7th grade year, when I was required to take diagram tests on the human reproductive organs. I remember the majority of the courses resembled learning body parts and identifying STDs. The only time homosexual sex was mentioned was when my teacher explained that gay men were responsible for the spread of AIDS, which certainly could have unintentionally "taught" us students to view gay men in a negative light. In addition, as noted in Nakula's chapter,  "the general lack of a discourse of desire, as Fine describes it, leaves the larger picture frameless" (188). Perhaps this was a topic that was mature for a 7th grade group of students, but I think it could have certainly been explored in high school to help students better understand the world. 

Another important point I learned from this chapter is that if educators don't supply students with sexual education, then students will find other outlets to gain this knowledge, such as when Jerry and his friends watched the older brother's DVDs. Clearly, it would be better for our students if they had a safe place to ask questions and to learn, since sex is a natural part of life. When Nakula explains the idea of "Abstinence approaches to sexuality education" it brought up many thoughts about the Catholic school I used to work for. I always felt that we were depriving our students of necessary information by teaching this curriculum, rather than preventing anyone from having sex. I certainly don't think teaching "shame" should be a part of the curriculum. As Nakula mention, only teaching one form of sexual expression is dangerous. In fact, I learned more from asking my mom than I learned at school, but many of our students may not have someone knowledgable who they are willing or able to speak to, which is why educators do play I role in helping them through this development. 

Nakkula Chapters 7 & 8

This week, I enjoyed reading Nakkula's insights on racial identity and the ethnic identity development. Chapter seven on racial identity brought up some relevant ideas that I can keep in mind while working with a diverse student population. One idea that I found quite riveting was the theory of race as a social construction. Nakkula argues, "It (race) was created largely to divide people, giving power to some while taking it away from others. Like all social phenomena, it morphs and moves depending on the power dynamics of the context" (124). This really stood out to me because race is certainly a large part of our identities and it's interesting to imagine that this is something that is merely constructed. This reminded me of American history since different groups have been discriminated against during different decades, such as Chinese immigrants at Angel Island, who were treated similar to Muslim refugees today.

Since we know that race is a way to label people, it is important for me to remember that students are entering my classroom with experiences and a sense of self that is created based on their race. "When a student enters your school, classroom, or office, she brings with her the layers of historical and cultural experiences that have shaped the identity she inhabits" (120). This makes me think that students could see themselves as having major strengths or weaknesses based on how the overall society, including the media, views and depicts their race, and vice versa for White students. As teachers, this is something we need to keep in mind when educating our students. As Nakkula explains, it is likely that students of color feel "stuck" until race is discussed, while White students may only feel uncomfortable when the topic of race is brought up, which is part of White privilege. I will continue to bring up this "uncomfortable" topics in the room so all students have a voice in the classroom, not just the dominant culture.

Nakkula: Chapters 4 & 5

This week, I read read Chapter 4 and 5 in Understanding Youth. Chapter 4, "Flow and Possibility Development," explained the concept of optimal development for youth. In my own words, this is characterized by the gratitude or sense of accomplishment one feels when he/she masters a task that required time and practice to achieve. This is the opposite of small tasks where we seek instant gratification. I found it interesting that the chapter compared this concept to helping students master skills within their interests.

For example, the antidote about Lorena taught us that helping students master a skills that inspires them, such as rowing, will then help build confidence, "The more confident and competent we feel, the more likely we are to venture into new learning activities" (71). This shows us why Lorena was then able to start applying this newly found confidence to other subjects in school, including English class.

This chapter led me to think about my own students, specifically the student I am using for my upcoming paper. He does have a specific interest outside of school, but as the chapter points out, to a degree, it seems to have a negative impact on his academics, "Some will organize their adolescent experiences so thoroughly around athletic pursuits and related social experiences that their academic and career possibilities will be compromised" (73). Since he spends all the time he could be doing homework, focusing on this one sport, I am worried this may be the case for him. I'm hoping going forward in my project I will discover strategies to help this student in particular turn his interest into a supporting factor in his educational pursuit.

To Teach: Part Two

This week, I read the second half of Ayers and Alexander-Tanner's comic book, To Teach. There were many sections of the text that resonated with me. One in particular was on page 70, "I want children to explore the world in order to take meaning from it and to make sense of it. I'm not interested in their feeding on predigested materials; I want them to get right up next to what they're studying, to touch it and smell it." This description led me to ponder about the importance of making authentic learning experiences for students. Rather than having students read statistics about a war in a textbook, students could read a memoir from a survivor or analyze a film. If possible, students could even hear from a veteran guest speaker. Students are far more likely to remember the war in this case and even question whether or not war is the right answer after seeing the repercussions.

Another good point that resonated with me this week was the importance of knowing your students and challenging the status quo. In Chapter 6, the teacher is torn between following the small-group procedures and allowing his students to work together. Despite being told to keep students separate, the teacher still decided to "shake things up" (92). This reminded me of my current experience at school since I have classes that are grouped based on ability. I also have tiered group that were arranged based on reading level. I am supposed to use the same grouping frequently in class, but I myself see the benefit of working together as a whole-group and using heterogeneous grouping within the classroom. I also fear that labels will lead students down the path of self-fulfilling prophecy.

To Teach

This week I read William Ayers' book, To Teach, the journey, in comics. One central argument of the text that stood out to me was in chapter 2, "Seeing the Student." Ayers reminds us that students are often labeled, which is currently an epidemic in our country. He explains that these labels can have serious unattended consequence for children. Children begin to fixate on their limitations, rather than their potential. This idea reminded me of the truths behind self-fulfilling prophecies. This reminded me of my own experiences as a student when I moved from Pawtucket to Foster in third grade. I went from being the top in my class to being labeled as "behind" in Foster. I remember feeling devastated and I begged my mother to take me back to Pawtucket so I could be smart again. Labels can certainly make someone question their own intelligence and push him/ her down the path of low self-esteem.


Ayer also gives an example of his own son Chesa, whom he anticipated as being a challenging student. Ayer was taken back when Mr. Sweeney mentioned Chesa's talents and capabilities before noting that at times he was a challenging student. I found myself agreeing with Ayers' thoughts on this topic. Reflecting on my own teaching, I think there have been times in my career when I have been too fixated on a student's downfalls or problematic behavior rather than his/ her potential. This year, I have tried using more positive reinforcement and community building within my classroom to build stronger connections with my students. I am hopeful that this will help me work better with students who demonstrate problematic behavior through restorative justice practices.

Lastly, in chapter 4, "Building Bridges," I enjoyed reading about the teacher, Avi, who witnessed an uneasy exchange in class about a racial situation that escalated. When the white student made an ignorant comment about people of color, Avi allowed another student in class to challenge her remarks in a confrontational manner. Avi then questioned whether or not he made the right choice within the class. This reminded me of my own experiences when teaching privilege and institutional racism within the classroom. These topics can be uncomfortable for me and probably many students, but the conversations matter. Tapping agains the glass is the only way to push back on injustice, and I agree with Ayers when he explains that these conversations won't solve racism, but they are still important.

Autobiography of a Learner

I started off my schooling in Pawtucket, RI at Varieur Elementary School. In second grade I moved to Providence and spent one year switching schools a total of three times. I was also homeschooled for several weeks during this year. In third grade, I moved to Foster and attended Captain Isaac Paine School. I went from getting straight As to being told I was “behind.” This seriously damaged my self-esteem. I remember asking my parents to please move back to Pawtucket so that I could be smart again.  Going forward, I was never the person who could get straight A’s. I begin struggling in school with test taking and oral speaking. I also was not enrolled as an honor student, while my siblings were, which made me feel inadequate.

In high school, I had a wonderful English teacher for three consecutive years. She motivated me to do well in school and she doubled as my “mentor.” She was a great teacher who offered a hands-on learning approach to engage all students. She helped me realize that I wanted to become a teacher just like her. This dream formed during my sophomore year of high school and I have been chasing it ever since. I knew that RIC was a good school for educators and it was within my price range so I was able to apply and start there as a freshman.  In college, I overcame my school troubles by working very hard to maintain a 3.5 GPA.

Theories of Teaching & Learning

In Smith's article, "What's Going on Here," I found myself comparing Smith's theory on learning with my own education. The "official view" of learning is often found throughout the country's education system, and Smith makes it clear that this view can be dangerous. As Smith notes, "The official theory became an unquestioned part of most of us because it permeates the broad educational culture in which we have grown up" (5). From my own experiences as a learner, I can agree that the most emphasis in my education has been placed on grades and scores instead of learning. Our society tends to associate grades and scores with effort and educational gains, but as educators, we have all seen our struggling students who do exert effort. It's important to realize that learning does happen everyday, and learning is often a social act. Therefore, students should have the time to learn from each other and collaborate together in order to advance their knowledge, rather than segregating learners.

Smith's article also helped me reflect on my practice as a teacher. At my new job this year, my school uses a competency based learning model to ensure that students reach mastery level of a subject in order to advance to the next grade. This means, teachers give students the opportunity to revise their work until they reach the master level. Although I can foresee certain challenges this may create for teachers and learners, I do think the message relates to Smith's view on the classic view of learning. Learning is continuous, and giving students multiple chances to revise could help them even improve their own confidence since they will eventually meet the mastery level.

As I continue my journey in this new year, I found Dodd's article, "Learning to Read the Classroom: The Stages Leading to Teacher Self-Actualization," helpful. Personally, I feel that I still fall in step three since I am turning to research to best help me create curriculum for a new year. Going into my fourth year as an educator, I found it insightful and even comical at times to read through the first stages of teaching. I am happy to know that there are stages of teaching which are not expected to transition year-to-year. There have been moments where I doubt myself as a teacher because I have felt that I should be more confident in my teaching practices since I have been doing this several years already. This article helped me come back to reality in terms of teachers being life-long learners who should continue to reflect on their practices, "students learn best when their teachers are always engaged in the process of 'becoming better teachers'" (249).